12

I really really need to scream right now.. its almost one in the morning and I'm still not done. piesghwpibhwrpbihrwpbih it's okay I keep telling myself fuckkk. I need someone to talk to, to vent to, someone to reassure me. But my mom is sleeping, and my dad I don't really know how to talk to him, and my friends don't deserve me yelling at them about this shit, and Jeffrey is packing and I dont want to disturb. I shouldn't shouldn't shouldn't have left it so late, although I had the entire week, and I grounded myself from going out with friends just to finish this shit. I really really want a 7 in english. I can't settle for anything less, and this IOP matters and I don't know what to do. aiehbrwih I'm so angry at myself I can't even do anything.

Nevermind, I'll update this things tomorrow, not that I have alot to say, but I do think it's due for an update.. Ahhh, fuck even if my IOP is over tomorrow, Jeffrey leaves to Korea. :\ I'll miss him. But at least CNY will give me time to hang out with my friends, I can't help feel like I'm neglecting them for him sometimes.. :\

WHY AM I TALKING ABOUT THIS

I HAVE SO MUCH WORK

NO SLEEP TONIGHT.

11

SEUNG RI IS V.I.P <33
I can't wait till Lily, Shirly and I go to Korea to find out respective soulmates HAHAHA.
I haven't been updating in agesss gahh, so much to do!

Today's thursday, so that means its AWWA day. I think the kids changed alot over the Christmas break, like they became more crazy. Like yileen's husband suddenly became gay, and starting saying he loved the two new guys that joined us, hahaha KORKOR. I kind of feel sorry for them becasue they are NOOBS hahaha. But I can't help but feel so incredibly tired today, and I used to feel this sense of overwhelming pride whenever I came back from AWWA, now I'm kind of tired all the time, and I have so little enthusiasm for everything, so I guess I have no FLOW, like Mr. Abad said. I wonder what FLOW feels like.. hahaha. So jaded!

Today, we missed English with Keegan for a random film on the Pakistani-Indian issue. No offence, I know its important and all that, but it was so incredibly boring, and most of the grade were fast asleep. I know because I could hear people next to me snoring. I fell asleep on Cristi, ahaha, but she didn't mind. Like the movie was some kind of excuse for nap time for the G11s Some indian music started blaring at such random intervals, I think it was a way to wake us up, but that nonetheless failed :) It took up so much time! We couldn't even have lunch properly. Sigh, sometimes I feel I'm kind of immature about like these kind of stuff, like war and genocide, and all I think about is when they'll let us out, and what can I eat.. nevermind.

IOP why why why! WHY did she put it on saturday! I guess I shouldn't complain. At least I'm only doing it infront of 4 people, so that would loosen the nervousness. I hope.

Oh dearrr, my dad just texted me asking what kind of joke I was playing, when I put Seung Ri on his desktop background, oops I think I forgot to change it back. Ah well he's more interesting than his boring fish! I've totally forgotten how to listen to english music, and all my dayss are filled with cracking :)

hello weekend, what took you so long?

SHIRLY STOP INSULTING SR I WILL KILL YOUR HELLO KITTY.

10

School started! I don't mind really, I secretly enjoy school ahaha, becuase I think I'm leaving in 2 years, so might as well embrace it.

Today, someone in my english class presented his creative project, and I was so amazed at how well he spoke. It is unfair that some people are just so eloquent and confident at public speaking, I wish I was? His speech was practically flawless, although it got boring, his tone made you want to listen. I need to know how to do that.

Gave Jess her duck today, was pretty embarassing to walk into school with it, hugging a toy duck. And its not like it was painted in a subtle colour, but rather YELLOW and not small either! Ahahahah, oh wel I think she liked it :) which as goood. Valerie go her strawberry 'souffle' plant from Lily. Giving presents is so much fun! Alot of drama has been going on in schol now, but I guess if we just stay out of it, it wouldn't bother us I think, but easier said than done. Shit, I just realized I left the candie valerie gave me in my locker! NOOOO.. and i hope maribelle doesnt take it HAHAHA. :)

Excited for tomorrow! I think.. yes I'm finally going to exercise! After a term of no movement, I kind of miss PE i guess, so tomorrow squash with lily! And a korean girl and niki G :) I hope its fun, even though I don't know to play and all that. I wish our school would have more variety in their sports, like footbal rec and softball, not like fricking laoshi's lion/dragon dance. :\ Which only reminds me how weird my chinese teacher is.. jesus christ we should get her a boyfriend.. but I like her, she's funny.

My dog's been making weird noises lately, so she sounds like that chewbacca from star wars. I think lao shi should go touch her throat to tell me what's wrong with it.. :\ hahah EW.

BIO TEST BIO TEST. I hate Ms Williams!! Why do I get all the weirdo single teachers..

9

9th post! first post of '09! I like when coincidences happen. Haha christmas beat new years for me, because I managed to go out with him, but new year's eve was sadly pathetic. Staying at home, helping my mom plan her spinsters parties are never fun. Ah well, to next year yes? Yesterday, I finally saw Tomoca after ages, which was nice, and now I feel terrible only chipping in $3.50 to a $300 bill, haha oh dear. I'll get someone to pass the money to him. Yesterday night was amusing, I would have thought it would be awkward, but not really :) Then after that in the early morning was such a mess? With everyone having simultaneous problems, but I don't think we did have problems at the same time, but rather it makes it easier to tell when you know people are more or less going through the same thing.

Hongkong was amazing with Lily! So much fun, shopping non stop, and the food there is good. I'm so into H&M right now? Plus I hear they're gonna build one here but I'm not sure how true that is. I seem to constantly blog at bad times, now in the midst with English presentation, with a Psych one hanging over my head, but I honestly cannot be fucked to be bothered with it right now. I should write new year's resolution, but I dont think i can handle the disappointment, that even after a year, I wouldn't have completed any. I'm starving.

Anyways, I watched Alice In Wonderland the day before yesterday, and I realized its kind of very deep for a children's movie? How odd, hahah. I can't help but think that this has incredible optimism to the way we deal with the new year! :)

Alice: I wonder if I've been changed in the night? Let me think. Was I the same when I got up this morning? I almost think I can remember feeling a little different. But if I'm not the same, the next question is 'Who in the world am I?' Ah, that's the great puzzle!

Tomorrow's school. Such a downerr, but nevermind, I'll get to see my friends again which is always good, there's a certain anxiety about buying presents, and I think I enjoy giving them, hahah having that look on their face.